The Journey of an Amazing Dean requires support!

RIP..First Apartment (13534)

A lot has happen over the past few days! I moved out of my first apartment and I couldn't have been happier. This was a big step in my life, for the first time, I felt I was beginning to transition into a new phase of my life..in many cases a fresh start. A lot has happen in my first apartment in queens. From earning my MBA to fostering life-long friendships to falling in love and out of love..This place was a significant part of my life, one that in someways I will miss..RIP 13534, let the memories live on in my head :-)

So now out with the old and in with the new..This past weekend I moved into my new place which is located in the heart of Forest Hills. It a much nicer location and one that I think will be a great place to open myself up to new experiences. I couldn't be happier.

Assistant Dean James, this guy is going around the world!

During my transition, I couldn't help but think about the people that truly were helping me through some of the personal problems I was going through. My Family, friends and even co-workers provide with a support system. The truth is as an Assistant Dean, I act as a support system for hundreds of students everyday, but the truth is that we all need that system. And I am no better...we sometimes try to be Superman but in hindsight, we all have weakness, we all have kryptonite.

It is in our darkest moments where we need our friends/family/co-workers to give us strength where we didn't have it before.

Before I commit to the Amazing Race, I need to understand completely who is my true support system, who can I put my faith in and who will be there with me right to the very end!

In Tyler Perry's, Madea goes to Jail, the lead character said something that I believe was insightful about who is your true support system... It goes like this...

"If somebody wants to walk out of your life, let - them - go!

Some people are meant to come into your life for a lifetime, some for only a season and you got to know which is which. And you're always messing up when you mix those seasonal people up with lifetime expectations.

I put everybody that comes into my life in the category of a tree. Some people are like leaves on a tree. When the wind blows, they're over there... wind blow that way they over here... they're unstable. When the seasons change they wither and die, they're gone. That's alright. Most people are like that, they're not there to do anything but take from the tree and give shade every now and then. That's all they can do. But don't get mad at people like that, that's who they are. That's all they were put on this earth to be. A leaf. 

Some people are like a branch on that tree. You have to be careful with those branches too, cause they'll fool you. They'll make you think they're a good friend and they're real strong but the minute you step out there on them, they'll break and leave you high and dry.

But if you find 2 or 3 people in your life that's like the roots at the bottom of that tree you are blessed. Those are the kind of people that aren't going nowhere. They aren't worried about being seen, nobody has to know that they know you, they don't have to know what they're doing for you but if those roots weren't there, that tree couldn't live. 

A tree could have a hundred million branches but it only takes a few roots down at the bottom to make sure that tree gets everything it needs. When you get some roots, hold on to them but the rest of it... just let it go. Let folks go."
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When I read these quotes from Madea and I have to be honest, they do seem profound and quite insightful. If we are the tree, then who are our leaves, that are unstable, our branches who can break and leave you high and dry and finally who are our roots that will always be there.

Recently I discovered a few people in my life that are branches..People that I thought would be my support system, but the minute things became hard or things had to become difficult they left me high and dry...

The truth is...It's Ok...because in the end I will forgive them, as I hope they can forgive me. In many ways, we tend to define people as twigs, but the truth is, perhaps we were twigs to one another. Sometimes we need to evolve and sometimes we need time to evolve.

Who are my Roots?

There are only a few people that I consider my roots... first my family..

Left to Right: Tiffany, Mom, Dad, Me, Aunt Annette, Aunt Daff, Aunt Lana

Lisa and Ethan

Growing up my family was always my base, they raised me from birth, they taught my values and ultimately made me the person I am today...They are also the people that when I have my challenges, they give me hope, they give me strength and they give me the will keep moving forward.

Beyond my family, I also have my friends.

Nick 

Adela and Janine

Far Right: Leighann

Nick, Adela, Janine, Leighann and Ebony (Not pictured) for over 7 years, these people have been a cornerstone of my life in college, and even beyond... while we were not always together, we were always there for one another and through everything that has happened, we have built lifelong bonds.

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Ultimately, I believe that my friends and family will be there to support me through anything including the race, they are my roots, but the final point that Madea makes which makes me think about who I know will be there to support me is the following..

"If somebody wants to walk out of your life, let - them - go!

Some people are meant to come into your life for a lifetime, some for only a season and you got to know which is which. And you're always messing up when you mix those seasonal people up with lifetime expectations.

Some people are meant to be there forever while others are only meant to be there for a season and we have to know which is which....These seasonal people are considered my leaves...


So before I embark on my journey to the race..my roots (my family and friends will be there to support me. An Amazing Dean needs support from Amazing people.